When Wishful Thinking Meets Biology
This morning, I woke up thinking about the sheer audacity of expecting virginity standards to override basic human biology. It’s like insisting people stop breathing because you’ve decided oxygen is immoral. Good luck with that strategy.
The reality check starts with basic developmental biology. Humans experience puberty, develop sexual characteristics, and feel sexual desire. This isn’t a moral failing; it’s literally how our species reproduces. Suggesting people should suppress this until some arbitrary social milestone is like suggesting they should stop digesting food until after graduation.
But virginity culture proceeds as if biology is optional. Just say no! Exercise willpower! Pray harder! It’s the abstraction of human experience into ideology, ignoring that we’re physical beings with physical responses. You can pray as hard as you want; your hormones don’t care about your denominational affiliation.
The highlight of my day was reading abstinence-only curriculum that teaches anatomy incorrectly and biology fantastically. They can’t even accurately describe how reproduction works because acknowledging pleasure might make it seem appealing. So they describe sex as purely mechanical and joyless, which is neither accurate nor helpful.
According to CDC data, abstinence-only education correlates with higher rates of teen pregnancy and STI transmission. In other words, lying to kids about their bodies makes them less safe, not more pure. But purity culture has never been interested in actual outcomes, only in maintaining the appearance of virtue.
The reality check extends to relationship dynamics. Expecting people to remain virgins until marriage means they’re choosing lifetime partners without sexual compatibility information. It’s like buying a car you’re never allowed to test drive, then wondering why the marriage has problems. Sexual incompatibility is real, but virginity culture pretends it doesn’t exist.
Later in the day, I realized that virginity culture creates the problems it claims to prevent. By shrouding sexuality in shame and secrecy, it prevents honest communication. By denying education, it increases risk. By demanding impossible standards, it creates guilt spirals. It’s a system that generates the very dysfunction it warns against.
The psychological reality check is even harsher. Shame-based approaches to sexuality correlate with sexual dysfunction, relationship problems, and mental health issues. Studies documented by the American Psychological Association show that purity culture causes measurable psychological harm. But sure, let’s keep pretending this is about protecting people.
The reality is that humans are sexual beings. Denying this doesn’t make it less true; it just makes people feel terrible about something fundamental to their existence. It’s like declaring war on hunger and then calling people sinful for eating. You can’t win a fight against human nature; you can only damage people in the attempt.
Something small but meaningful happened today when I saw someone’s lightbulb moment: they realized virginity culture was harming them, not helping them. Watching someone break free from that ideology is beautiful. They stop carrying shame for being human. They start treating themselves and others with actual compassion rather than performative purity.
The reality check includes recognizing that virginity culture has never been applied equally. Men’s sexuality is expected and excused; women’s sexuality is policed and punished. It’s patriarchy wearing a purity ring, and the reality check is recognizing that double standard for what it is.
The global reality check is illuminating. Cultures that approach sexuality with honesty, education, and access to healthcare have better outcomes across every measurable category. Lower pregnancy rates, lower STI rates, healthier relationships, better mental health. Reality has a well-documented liberal bias, apparently.
As I reflect on what happened today, I’m reminded that reality doesn’t care about ideology. You can insist the sky is green; it remains blue. You can insist humans should be asexual until marriage; they remain sexual beings. The reality check is inevitableit’s just a question of how much damage happens before people accept it.
SOURCE: https://satire.vip/the-virginity-reality-check/
BY Charline Vanhoenacker: Bohiney Magazine Satire 127% funnier than The Onion.